Author Archives: joannaohayes

Intrapsychic Loss

There are many skills from our childhoods we need to unlearn. Upbraiding a child for crying over a dropped ice cream is one of them. There are many events which lead to grief. But we have a shared language for … Continue reading

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How to get rid of crankiness.

Well, posting weekly didn’t quite go the way I’d planned in November! Unsurprising really, as we had a baby (and by we I mean my sister who I live with), so the month got took over a bit! I also … Continue reading

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All Saints Day

Three saints turned up at my house today. They insisted they enjoy weeding (which seems very strange to me). Saints must be some kind of miracle workers. Another saint turned up later, just as we were finishing dinner. He was … Continue reading

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Blogtober/vember/cember

One of the parts of growing yourself up is finding out your flaws, weaknesses and foibles and working on them. I have a few things that I can’t tell if they’re personality, nurture, trauma or even a “real” problem… But … Continue reading

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Orange Move Three Month Update

Atypically for me, I’m making this blog post a little early. Essentially this is my three month post-move update, but really that should be on the 29th. Anyways, as for all my posts, it’ll be tl:dr, so a very basic … Continue reading

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Welcome to stress

It may sound a little silly to you that I, or anyone, would find anything exciting about #lockdownlyf but, I’ve found something that I feel I can finally contribute to those around me at a time they’re willing to listen, … Continue reading

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Being annoying in the time of cholera*

One of my many annoying characteristics is that I interrupt a lot. It’s probably why some people have wondered if I have a personality disorder, and why others have simply wondered if I understand basic manners. It’s a no to … Continue reading

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Historical abuse

This blog is the second in a three-part series about responding to revelations of abuse in the church. Please see the first post first. This is an invitation to move on from shock to a heartbroken, truth-filled and more useful … Continue reading

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When the silence is broken.

So here’s the thing. For every new revelation of abuse within the church, there are those of us who are not surprised. Saddened yes. Heartbroken even. But not in the least surprised. Maybe it’s because we’re the real Calvinists, even … Continue reading

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The Mundanity of Suicidality – or, why one RUOK day is never enough (even though I recognise the value of awareness raising and hope you all check out the resources available).

For those of us for whom depressive thought patterns started early on in life, it can be tricky to understand what’s normal for most people. Part of me figured that probably not everyone went through phases of suicidal thoughts (of … Continue reading

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